EXTRA EXTRA!! Matt Gaetz did the thing we were all pretty sure he did.

Drew Hurd
2 min readMay 1, 2021

I mean does this need a news story?

Yes Yes, I know we all live in an era of fake news and “agenda driven narratives” and blah blah blah, you really F****ing hitched yourself to a bad ride here Matt.

What bothers me the most is that on some level I know whats going to happen.

  1. Gaetz is gonna deny the validity of these claims and his supporters will believe it.
  2. He is going to use the term cancel culture in almost every media appearance.
  3. He is going to face the same level of consequence here that he did for drunk driving. Which for a well connected white man, with and I must stress here ZERO morals(Thats how I separate asserting that all people of a race are this way. I’m not stupid, I know not all white people get away with this, but ALL* of the WELL CONNECTED MORAL Lacking ones do)

This is the cynicism that bothers me. The dude who basically committed the crime with him, said it happened. But apparently admitting to a crime and asserting that others did it with you is just a plot by commies or child eaters or some stupid bullshit.

Who else can we picture when we see people skirt the consequences of the crimes their co-conspirators implicated them in?

Its like some hilarious farce or mocking of destiny that would give these same bastards bad hair(lets be real, Gaetz is trying to bring the pompadour back and his execution of it sucks) the same vacant, soulless eyes, and the same fanbase.

Sometimes I feel like Florida attracts all the worst people to protect the rest of us, but we don’t heed the message, like a kind of Evil/Stupidity sponge but we keep using it to wash the rest of our dishes still.

*okay maybe like 97%-98% its really not fair to say ALL.



Drew Hurd

College Dropout, Drinks too much, Doesn’t write enough,